When You Don't Have Anything to Give

Sometimes people need more from us than we have to give. I am mainly thinking of times when I start to depend on myself to meet others spiritual needs and I cannot do it. For example, there have been times when I have felt spiritually tired, dry or worn out.  Then someone needs to talk, or needs prayer, or counsel or just anything. Often my first thought can be: “How do I tell them I don’t have anything to give them?”

Fortunately, I usually don’t want to admit my weakness to them so I confidently say “Sure, let’s talk”, or “What can I pray for you about?”

Why “fortunately”?  Because then, as I am praying for them, listening to them or asking questions, the Holy Spirit gives me a gentle kick of reminder that I am not the one who needs to meet their needs, He is.
I learned long ago that God was not dependent on my spiritual state in order to bring truth, healing or insight to one of his children. I still forget.

And yet, God is faithful to me in these times, just as He is to the person seeking my help. I have found that in difficult times or times of doubt or dryness in my own soul, the words that God will share with someone through my prayer or conversation with them end up building my own faith and reminding me of truths I have temporarily forgotten.

I once spent some time talking and praying with an acquaintance that was unsure of God’s love for her. She was struggling to grasp how she could be special to God, separate and distinct from all the millions of other people in the world.  It was important to her to feel known, understood and valuable as an individual. I don’t remember what I said, what I prayed or much about the actual encounter at all except I knew that what was coming out of my mouth was not anything I could have thought of at the moment. I also knew that it was just as much for me as it was for her.  She left our time feeling that God had given her something to hold onto and treasure about her “specialness” to Him, and I left vowing to never depend on my own wisdom and sense of maturity again.

I also began learning the gift of being empty of great ideas, wise insights and spiritual hyperbole for others.  The more I was able to approach those kinds of situations knowing how empty handed I was, the more God was able to touch that person Himself.  He didn’t have to shout at them over the din of my ideas and solutions for them, but He could speak quietly to both of us. I think I often gain more in these times than those I pray for or counsel.

It can be scary to be with people if you think you have to pull something out of your spiritual hat for them. It is actually less scary to just ask God to take over. Then, if nothing awesome happens, it is His fault, not yours. He is the responsible party anyway.  You and I can’t fix anybody. But we can get out of the way and let God do what He wants to do.  

Have you found yourself in this situation too? How did you handle it? You can write me at ellenpjacobs@gmail.com.  I’d love to hear your stories too.